Are you in love with someone
who doesn’t know you exist?
We’ve probably all
had a secret crush on someone. It’s
relatively harmless when you think about it.
You can admire someone from a distance.
Maybe they help you to look your best or help to aspire you to your best
self when you’re around them. There’s
virtually nothing wrong with that notion.
However, when we start creating a relationship with the person in our
mind without the other person’s consent, that’s when it becomes a problem.
The best example of
a secret crush I can give you could be the love you feel for your personal
trainer or doctor but it could also be anyone else who is in a position to be really
helpful towards you or that you admire a lot.
You can talk to him about anything and he will listen to you free of any
type of judgment. You begin to look
forward to seeing him on a regular basis.
He shows you warmth and tender loving care every time you meet. He even flirts with you periodically. You think that you’re in love. No one has ever showed you as much attention
as him.
However, if you
look closer into how he treats his other clients you would see that you may not
be so special! It’s just part of his
business. He is in a business where charm
and charisma are necessary to get clients!
He treats you the way he feels you need to be treated so he can keep you
happy and content with his services.
Otherwise, you would look for someone else!
You may be
wondering what would happen if he reciprocated those same feelings you have for
him? Well, if he is really interested in
you, he will let you know by asking you out on a date. You need to be clear of his intentions for
you. And don’t be fooled by him asking you
for your phone number because he may just want to keep in touch with you for
any cancellations, re-scheduled appointments or other reasons outside of any
interest for you. The best way you’ll
know he’s interested is if he asks you out on a date. There really are no substitutes.
So what if you told
him how you feel? Well, the truth of the
matter is that you can tell him how you feel but be prepared for the
consequences. If he really isn’t
interested in you, you will feel totally awkward. What’s more is that you will have disrupted a
great working relationship. Once your
feelings are released, your relationship with him will have to change whether
it be that he is more careful with how he treats you going forward or that you
become colder or bitter towards him in the process. Either way, it’s a big risk so know what you
are in for before you decide to take this approach.
But just to make
you feel better, I will say that sometimes it’s just a matter of timing. If, by chance, he does indeed have a crush on
you as well, it may not be the right time.
He may want to honor the professional relationship he has towards you by
not taking it further until the work is done.
Or he may simply be involved with someone else and not want to break
your heart. You certainly don’t want to
have someone else’s leftovers when you can have your own meal!
The best case
scenario is that you wait for him to make the first move. You are certainly allowed to day dream about
him as long as you don’t act out on it. You
can even casually flirt with him as long as you keep it strictly harmless. Try not to dress like a slouch when you’re
around him so he does notice you improving your chances of him making a move. But do continue to date other people so you have
a life outside of him. This way if or when
he does come around, you won’t have wasted your time waiting for him. And if he does not, well, then you’ll have
your answer but you will have moved on anyway!
Good luck!
For more helpful dating tips, please check out my website at www.liveloveaspire.blogspot.com or you may inquire about my dating/relationship coaching services at www.liveloveaspire.com.
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