So I just recently signed on to work as a “Dear Abby” where I help to answer relationship questions for people by request. It’s been quite busy these days with the holidays approaching because who doesn’t want love for the holidays. Well, I really enjoy this job because I like helping people achieve their dreams of having a happy healthy relationship. Although I’ll admit at times, it can feel like I’m answering the same questions over and over again. And they’re mainly around women not having any control in their relationships.
Just the other day I was talking to one of my best girlfriends and she mentioned she had a new guy in her life. She seemed fairly happy with him and that everything seemed to be going okay. But then she mentioned he lives in another state and that she would go to see him often. I thought to myself, “Uh Oh!” I’m sure she noticed the hesitation in my voice so she re-assured me that it was fine because he’s been so busy with all of his work. I was like….okay? And you’re not busy with your work?
I simply made a suggestion that she gets him to come down and see her at least periodically rather than this being so lopsided. Well, my girlfriend has her pride and as women sometimes we don’t like receiving help when it comes to our love lives. Still, I tried to push her into not going to see him quite so often but I know this will fall on deaf ears.
I am also a landlord (yes, I have many jobs!) and one of my tenants just got a new “friend” (in her own words). Once in a while, I check in on her to make sure she’s okay, only to find her “friend” laid up on the couch chilling. In my mind, I’m thinking isn’t there something he could be doing for you besides eating up all your food. But I digress. It’s really none of my business. So I carry on watching her give her all to him and receiving nothing in return. She even takes out the trash while he plays video games!!
I’m just so sad to see women give so much to men with little to nothing in return. It continues to sadden me despite the many years I’ve been doing this thing. I keep hoping one day women will take their power back and reclaim their rightful place on the throne.
It does make me more appreciative of my own sweetheart for the wonderful things he does for me. When we first met, I cancelled on him several times before I said yes to him because I was so busy. And guess what? He re-arranged his own schedule just to be near me. I don’t mention this to brag but to explain why it is so important that women carry themselves as Queens. You see, men don’t value the things they don’t work hard for…which is why we have to keep them on their toes. Besides, do you want to be the one to get down on one knee? Case closed…
The more a woman gives her power over to a man, the more he takes it and runs. It’s not their fault. They like easy stuff. The easier the better for them. The relationship starts out really nice. Boy meets girl. Boy asks girl out on a date. Date goes well and then boy asks her out the next day…”spontaneously”. Girl says yes then boy asks girl to “come over” the next day….girl then goes and abandons all of her plans for fear of not getting another date…. girl starts complaining boy doesn’t take her out anymore….but boy is fine with this and doesn’t know what her problem is…girl hits breaking point…and breaks up with boy….boy still scratching his head because he thought everything was going well…..the end!
And the cycle continues….
That’s why we ladies need structure…a guidepost for dating….if you haven’t read the Rules, I suggest you pick up a copy today!
Let’s make 2017 the year of great relationships!
Have a safe and happy holiday season!