Monday, September 28, 2015

Why Singles Desperately Need To Hang Around Happy Couples


Can blissfully happy couples rub off of you?....let’s see…

If you’ve ever watched happy couples, then you’ll know how infectious it is to be seen.  There is just this blissful joy and belonging that the couple shares that makes us all stop and stare at them.  I believe it’s their love and happiness that we all wish we could have in our lives.  And since my job causes me to be a woman of many hats including professional coach and trainer, I have the luxury of being around lots of people including these blissfully happy couples, and I can tell you that just by virtue of being around them, you feel like you can achieve the same dream of being in this blissful state of happiness.

I laugh when I think of this but I believe everyone needs a “role model couple” to look up to for their own relationship.  This isn’t necessarily about comparisons but it is about being able to determine what constitutes a good relationship and what does not constitute one.  There’s something different about couples that are on the right track or walking together that makes them stand out from the rest and consequently keeps them together forever and ever.  They have a wealth of knowledge from years of experience that other couples and singles just don’t have or have gained in their lives.

For instance, there’s a way these couples interact with each other.  They don’t just text each other – they actually call each other to make sure the other one is okay.  How do you settle disputes?  They allow the other person to voice their opinion and are mindful not to disrespect each other.  It’s the way they hold hands whenever possible to show a quiet type of affection towards each other.  When there are kids involved, they respect each other’s authority and not allow the kids to undermine them.  There is a general sense of trust towards each other and they respect each other’s boundaries accordingly.  These are all great things for singles to learn in trying to find their own respective mates.

In other words, as a single person, you need to know what “good” looks like in a relationship.  When you’re surrounded by other singles, you don’t necessarily learn that except through trial and error.  If you take the time to surround yourself with strong happy couples, then their countless displays of love and affection towards each other will eventually rub off on you.  More often than not, singles only surround themselves with other singles and regurgitate the same information and sometimes keeping them single rather than hearing from happy couples of how they’ve been able to stay together.

But you may say, I don’t know any happy couples!  I’m sure there are a few in your family, your neighborhood, at work, school…etc…etc…that you can observe and watch to learn what constitutes a great relationship.  And by the way, it’s not about imitating their relationship but creating your own great relationship by finding someone who is at least respectful and loving towards you as your foundation.

These happy couples are never really highlighted in our society because most of them live under the spotlight and rightfully so!  They don’t necessarily want or need the spotlight – just a happy home is their dream.  But we as singles can certainly learn a thing or two from them as we create our own little happy homes.  And who knows, maybe someday we can pay it forward by helping another young couple by being great role models to them as well!

Good luck!

Thanks for reading!

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